This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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