none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
