OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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