dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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