k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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