she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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