I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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