last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
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It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
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Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
not ubering you a puppy
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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