Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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