apparently the secret to your success is patron
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
