I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
