He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Girls should come with a carfax report
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
