therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
