Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
