As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Randomize
