yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
