So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
