I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
