For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
