So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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