last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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