i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
How external is "for external use only"?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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