WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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