We're like a lot better than the average bears
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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