Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
