why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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