i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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