Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize
