also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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