Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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