I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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