I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
