hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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