You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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