Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
