Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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