Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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