a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
