One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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