I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
