No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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