Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
