I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
