Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
