I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
