found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
