Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
