There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
