Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Couch. On fire.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
