I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
But break dance skills will only take you so far
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
